I Burned Miroku
by DUH BOMB
Summary: Being a pervert has consequences. Rated T for slight language, and sexual references I didn't think were bad enough to rate M.


A/N: Good update speed, yes?

It was a sunny day in the feudal era. The gang was sitting down and eating lunch. Inuyasha was eating ramen, Kagome rice, Shippo candy, and Miroku and Sango were eating stew. Sango was sitting on her knees, about to take a bite of stew when Miroku rubbed and slapped her butt, then went back to eating without missing a beat. Sango growled then raised her hand for two seconds, then slapped him hard. Miroku ended up spitting out his food. Sango took another bite of stew and started choking. After she stopped coughing Miroku got behind her and grabbed her breasts in a Heimlich maneuver. Sango flushed red. Miroku stood back slapped her on her butt and said,

"Well, now that you're better we can continue eating."

Sango punched him three times then sat down to finish her food. Inuyasha, Kagome, and Shippo watched in disgust.

"Hey Miroku, I'll bet you my ramen that you can't go one day without messing with Sango." said Inuyasha. Miroku pondered the challenge before replying.

"And if I lose?" Miroku asked.

"Then you have to let Sango see you naked!" said Shippo.

They look at him confused.

"What Miroku does it all time. Sango should get her chance." said Shippo defensively.

"Fine I accept." said Miroku.

All was fine until Miroku turned and talked to Shippo. Sango got up and bent over to get more stew. Miroku turned to ask Sango something and his face met Sango's butt. Inuyasha and Kagome sat with their mouths open. There was an eerie silence. Miroku turned his head. Sango stood up and hit him so hard he fell into the fire. Miroku howled in pain. They poured water on him to put out the fire. They carried him to Kaede as carefully, quickly, and gently as they could. Sango was crying.

It was late when Kaede had begun treating Miroku. Sango wept and paced outside the house.

"Sango, Miroku has, thankfully, only second degree burns. I'veput some herbal medicine on him and bandages. You can come see him now." Kaede barely got it out as Sango pushed past her to see him. Miroku was bandaged across his shoulders and chest. He had bandages on his head. He smiled meekly up at Sango.

"Hi, Sango." he croaked.

"Oh, I'm so sorry Miroku it's all my fault." Sango sat next to him, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Don't cry. I don't think my heart can take it." Miroku choked out.

"But-" Sango started.

"But nothing. I love you. I just turned my head at the wrong time." Miroku said smiling.

"Yeah- wait, did you say you love me?" Sango asked.

"Yes, I do Sango. I'm sorry for all the times I've groped yo. Maybe. Did you know your body feels fantastic?" Miroku grinned, rubbing her butt.

"You're pushing your luck, monk. And yes, I did." Sango said. Then she kissed Miroku so good his best friend got happy.

"Sango don't kiss me so passionatly my friend can't take it." Miroku said, gasping for breath.

Sango laughed.

"If you can't handle a kiss then how will you handle what we are going to do when you get better?" she said mischievously.

"Oh Sango, I'm finally rubbing off on you." said Miroku.

"Oh shut up and scoot over. I'm tired." Sango said yawing and getting in bed next to him. They fell asleep. The next few days Miroku got steadily better. Finally, the day came when Miroku could take a bath.

"Hey Inuyash has Sango seen Miroku naked yet? You know, because of the bet?" Shippo asked.

"How the hell do I know?!" Inuyasha said.

"Hey Sango, I want you to help me with my bath!" Miroku called. There was an eerie silence that followed the statement.

"Ok," was Sango's small response. When Sango was halfway to the cabin Inuyasha and Kagome exchanged looks.

"You go girl!" yelled Shippo.

Sango closed the cabin door. Miroku was standing by a big bucket full of hot water. Miroku looked at Sango.

"Sango, you deserve this after all I do to you." Miroku said as he took off his robe revealing his naked body. He looked away as Sango gasped and basked in his male figure. His chest gleamed in the light. His abs were a six pack. He had some scars, but that made him all the more sexy. His arms were toned to perfection. His butt was so cute. And his manhood... it was beyond words. Ssango found herself getting very excited. Miroku stepped into the water. He did it so slowly Sango found herself licking her lips in anticipation. Twenty minutes later they both stepped out of the hut. Sango went towards Kagome and Miroku headed towards Inuyasha.

"Sango how was it?" Kagome asked.

"Yeah, did you see Miroku naked like the bet?" asked Shippo.

"Yes I did. Kagome he is fine!" said Sango as the giggled and shared gossip.

"Well, did you keep up on your end of the deal?" Inuyasha asked as he ate an apple.

"Yep. Sango helped me with my bath... then we did it." Miroku put simply. Inuyasha had been drinking some water when Miroku said it. When he heard "did it" he did a spit take. Inuyasha coughed and choked before spitting out.

"Are you serious?!" was all Inuyasha could say.

"Yep. Once she saw me naked she couldn't keep her paws off me." Miroku said with a smile.

"Hm, maybe I should get Kagome to set me on fire." Inuyasha said.

The boys didn't know Kagome and Sango were right behind them and heard every word.

""Miroku we didn't do it I told you we would wait!" Sango yelled. She looked as demonic as the demons she exterminates. Kagome was the same way.

"Inuyasha you must be pretty damn stupid to ever think that I would sit you in front of a fire!" Kagome yelled. Then, regardless of his injuries, Sango attacked Miroku. Kagome yelled sit for a long time. No-one noticed Shippo and Kilala on a branch eating popcorn.

"See Kilala I told you this was a good idea." Shippo said through a mouth full of popcorn.

"Mew," was all Kilala could say before she took another bite of popcorn.

A/N: And done! Please R&R! Thanks for reading!


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